Two months without a post

Wow, didn't realized I did not post anything since October, this place must be dusty by now. Let see what I have been doing for the past two months.

I had joined a non governmental organization named Amoeba. They cater themselves to help out the society by visiting the unfortunates kids who got issues from their family or gotten dumped since they were a little kid. I am glad that I get to know them cause this had became my new aim in my life. I never had a aim since I was 19 and I needed one now to change my direction in my life. Previous post I mentioned about volunteer. Yes I am still volunteering myself to help out whoever is in need and I cannot stress how happy I am currently. In the space of two months, I had visited three orphanage home, and joined CATA camp for the second time

Honestly I cannot stress how good is CATA camp because there are no words to describe the experience I had been through in CATA camp. What I can say is, give it a try and you definitely will not regret of paying MYR190. Besides, MYR40 from MYR190 will be sponsoring an orphan to participate as well. So while you sponsor a kid to join CATA camp to learn new things, you learn new things too! Isn't that one stone two bird?

Coming soon there will be big projects coming along where I will be super busy because I am part of the committee. I just hope I can cope it because those task will not be easy. It is not things that I had done before and I certainly do not want to fail anyone simply because I do not want to disappoint them for putting so much trust in me.

Upcoming events:

1) Christmas Party

2) Home Visit by me

3) Amoeba Leadership Camp

4) Amoeba Launching

5) 30 hour famine leadership camp

6) Actual 30 hour famine

6 task to complete next year. I hope I can complete these task with flying colors. Of course I do not want to fail any of my subjects because it will be wasting time for me to retake and not to mention the amount of money I have to pay to retake. Ish!

My new girlfriends.

P.S: ILY. <3

义工

不知为什么，自己会那么喜欢义工。以前还没有做的时候，就觉得好像很麻烦。有很多东西要做，有很多人要依赖你。有很多东西要准备。

可是，现在的我好像真的是180度转变。既然爱上了义工。而且还试着带我的朋友一同参与。开始怀疑我到底是不是有问题。可是我真的深深爱上了做义工。昨天刚刚参加了一个义工的年庆。看到那么多的新朋友，真的很感触。因为真的有很多人想为这个社会做出贡献。所以我也不可以输。

这次的义工，必须去outstation. 所以我现在是在前往着滨城，做30 hours famine, 饥饿30的摄影师。跟上回一样，也适当摄影师。可是上回没有饿到，这次会是饥饿着拍照。

我希望我的人生可以那么充实，不要在懒懒散散了。滨城，我来了！出发！

我爱你，有错吗？

你知不知道；到你说你感觉到很怕我的时候，我真的痛了。

昨天是我人生中最长的三十分钟。从来没有经历过那么长的三十分钟。在那里，一直忍受。可是一开车的时候就崩溃了，开到回家。

我明白了。现在的我，伤痕累累。没想到，唯一的爱人资格都被取走。就连爱人的资格都没有。

今天妈妈叫我起床的时候，就已经发现我有问题。可是我否认。知我父母心，一点都没错。

别人都以为我很喜欢笑，别人都以为我很乐观，别人都以为我是笑娃娃，每天都在逗人笑。是，我是逗人笑，因为我不想别人好像我这样，每天愁眉苦脸。其实我也不想这样，可是我的性格和我周遭的事情，没办法让我不愁眉苦脸。

很多人都以为我开心果，可是又有多少人知道我正真快乐的时候而是少之又少。有多少人知道我面对的问题。

有时候我真的不想再掩饰。真的有一点累，因为每天都要带着那张面具，让别人以为我很快乐。可是，谁又能了解我的心情？

我，累了。我想休息。不想再想那么多。

Posting through iPhone, like FINALLY!!

Finally they made an app for bloggers I was starting to wonder if they going to neglect the users of blogspot Instead since they took SOOOOOOO long just to make one friggin app. Plus, I doubt it is hard to "compose" this app cause it's only 1.2mb and I downloaded it like less than 5 sec, wtf?

Anyways, yay finally they published this app and finally I get to write post from my iPhone!

Btw, that's recent me! Don't know how this attachment would turn out, let's hope for the best! :D

Random Post #1

Reading back my entries made me want to write a blog post. I have decided to disclose the recent me and the life of last semester. Let's go clockwise alright? We'll start from last semester.

I took Critical Thinking, Writing for Media, Group Dynamics and Effective Listening. 1 Level 100 paper, 2 Level 200 and 1 Level 300 paper. It's not as easy as I thought it was but also not as hard if I actually motivate myself to study harder. I was on the verge of breaking down cause my lecturer rejected my journals that I had picked for my research topics. That's not all. I had to cover on my Effective Listening, Writing for Media and Group Dynamics class as some of them do have group projects. So there's where the problems start kicking in.

Critical Thinking was really pain in the ass because I had to find 7 journals to support my research topics and believe me, it is not easy to find journals and suitable journals for your research topic. The first time I found 7 journals, only 3 are usable

My lecturer's remark was: "Research topic too broad. Please focus on one area."

I was like wtffff?!

So I had to change my topic and make it a little more specific. I had to crack my head and think of another. Thank god I found a topic specific enough. Found 7 journals and showed her, she said this to me..

"The first three journals are fine but not the last four. It's totally not related to the topic."

Geez! I was quite close to mental breakdown because I had other projects on hand! But thank god I get her approval right before the deadline and I get to finish my research topic before my presentation.

This was the only subjects that gets to my nerves. Other are quite okay because we worked in a group. So it is much easier since I can rely on my groupmates. At the end, I got my results; D for Critical Thinking, C for Group Dynamics and Writing for Media. I got B for Effective Listening! So I guess I'm a good listener afterall. :P

Comes to this short semester which only lasted for 7 weeks. I had midterms during week 4 and luckily I took easy subjects. 1 Level 300 paper and 1 Level 100 paper. It was okay cause I had already familiarize with the lecturer's style of teaching and the assignment she gave.

All I hope for is to pass both of this subjects. I do not wish to retake the subject again because I already running out of time. I do not want to waste my time. I want to graduate before the end of next year. But two senior projects just does not allow me to do so. Guess I only get to graduate in the year of 2013. I left less than 15 subjects if I'm not mistaken + 2 senior project. So hopefully I can rush it. Sighhhhh... :/

wha'ever

This blog is practically collecting dust since I am so busy with my life. Been throwing myself into all kinds of jobs and I am happy to say that I actually love it.

I did not blog for my entire short semester due to the workload I have to bare, in studies and work.
I am going to have my holiday for 2 weeks from now, ends at 15th of August. Move to Ara Damansara since July 10th. Close to 3 weeks and I missed my old house actually.
Past two days I volunteer to help out in a 30 hours famine event by helping them to take pictures. Yes so I am the photographer for the event. Get to know alot of friends there.


You can go to my facebook profile page to see a bigger picture of this. I am just too lazy to upload a bigger size cause it's going to take alot of time for me to do so.

Anyways, life have been good to me and I truly appreciate it. Last semester I have 1 B, 2 C and 1 D. Luckily that D is UIU subject so is considered as pass. But I am still thinking of retaking it cause I do not want to look bad in my CGPA.
I like this song. <3

Holiday....NOT!

Although is already second week of my holiday, I did not do anything much but work. I have been working on the day I finish my exam until today. I'm so exhausted and tired but at the same time, I need money to sustain myself cause I cannot depend on my mom and sisters anymore. I should be independent by this age but I am not.

Sighh..

But I get to know alot of friends from work! Some of them stay nearby, some stayed very far but I guess we will still meet in work. This work is very relaxing to be honest. I just need to talk to customer and such, not to mention I also get to watch movie for free! So yeah. I had watched Pirates of the Caribbean, Priest and Kungfu Panda 2! One minor flaw about that work, which is I have to wear formal. Suits is what I am talking about. Some cinemas are blardy hot and I had to wear formal. >_>

Next week is the final week of my holiday and I did not went on a trip. So sad.

Finals

Tomorrow is my first day of exam. Die liao.

Happy Birthday

to myself! Didn't get to celebrate cause I am in the middle of tough week. I need to complete a training module and prepare my presentation on Wednesday. This year's birthday, nothing special. Only bought some camera gadgets for myself. And my mom gave me some token. Next maybe post I will put up the gadgets I bought!

This month is quite hectic for me cause I need to conduct a training in class and a talk show as well. I am kind of exhausted for now, been sleeping at least 5am in the morning. Everyday took like 2 hours of nap and sleep for 3 hours then I had to wake up to continue my projects. How I wish I can spend some time with someone I adores, somewhere far enough for me to forget things that been bugging me.

The okok recent me

Just finished my midterm and another two quiz which I am not satisfied about. I guess I can kiss As good bye. I kind of screw up my Effective Listening because my lecturer gave an instruction about the page length and I only wrote one and quarter page. I do not know how will he access my paper but I really hope for the best because I cannot screw up this paper. Another paper would be Group Dynamics. I did not do so well on my first quiz, only managed to score 7 out of 15. Today I did another quiz, which is 10 and a half out of 15. So basically I had lost 12 and half marks out of 30. I can kiss As good bye for my Group Dynamics.

As for Writing for Media, I think I am doing pretty well at the moment, just that I need to see my midterm marks and my first assignment marks to double confirm if I should kiss my As goodbye. Critical Thinking would be pain in the ass. I am required to do SEVEN journals, access, summarize and explain to my lecturer tomorrow. Best thing? Not one journal is done. And the worst is that I have to present it on 30th of March, which is exactly 15 days later. I really need alot of luck for this semester because this is the first time I feel pressured on getting good grades for my paper.

But for the good news, I have found a house. Located near Taman Paramount LRT Station. It is a good venue because they have everything there. Supermarket, morning market my mom always go. Whatever you can think off, it is there. I am truly happy now because we finally got ourselves a house. So another problem just settled.

Problems are easy to solve when you talk things out. Of course you need to give some space to the other party because it is still fresh.

I know I am a problem solver. So for now I need to concentrate on my studies so that I can graduate fast!

Recent me

Too many things happened recently till I need to keep myself alone to think about the issues. Of course there are some good stuff happened. But bad things would be things that I had never thought of before.

I really did not know that at all until the night he told me. I am happy that he is being sincere to me but I find it hard to accept it. It takes time definitely and I still need more time to process the information I got it yesterday. Whatever it is, I still wish that both of them will have a happy ending.

I watched I am number four on Monday. I get to watch it premier cause my friend won four tickets to be one of the first to watch the movie It was a pretty decent show I must say and I enjoyed every bit of its CGI cause it was really awesome.

I really do not wish to remember sad things that I had encountered. I find it stupid to be dwell into the past and I never like to be staying in past. But sometimes reality just does not go along the way.

Now I need vacation. I need to get away from this place and take a break. But, where to? And, with who? :(

I do not know, what to trust anymore. Faith and courage had failed me, miserably. I find it hard to trust again.

...

I am a bastard child. Enough said

Facebook?

I have deactivated my facebook. Partly was because of my studies. Been neglecting alot even I get an okay result. But now I want to do better since I am doing double major. Need to put more effort as my syllabus is getting tougher and tougher.

Been wanting to deactivate my account long time ago but just do not have the time and guts to do so. Don't ask me why. I have no idea as well. I just feel like deactivate it.

Tomorrow will be my first day of working. So excited! :3 Can't wait for it but commitment needed and that's my weakest. I hardly can commit to anything and the last time I tried to commit, I ended up quitting the job. :S Hopefully this time around I can change things

COMMITMENT! AHHHHHHHHHHH!

My song of the week. Released 1st May 2010 @ iTunes.

Chinese New Year!

Chinese New Year was quite nice despite it is not as happening compare to last year's, but I don't really mind cause for the first time, I spare myself from eating with him. Something new to me I guess. If I'm not mistaken, I have no seen him since this year. I am intend to keep it this way since he does not have the heart.

My cousin's birthday falls on the day she visited my place, along with my other relatives! We had a cake from Secret Recipe! It is an awesome cake. Now I'm missing the cake. We had gambling session like every previous year to follow our tradition. This year I only won MYR16, but my sister lost like MYR100+ We played black jack, in-between and some other weird games. It was really fun cause I get to hang out with my cousins again!

After that we went for dinner. New Paris Restaurant! Pretty decent but is a little expensive I'd say. Two tables for MYR393. My brother in-law paid everything, but my aunt insist she wanted to pay some. So I guess there will be another dinner coming soon. But I'm going to work soon so probably I can't make it. Sighhh. :/

This Thursday I'm going to start my work. I am going to work in a petstore in One Utama! So do let me know if you want to buy anything from the petstore so that you will not be coming over knowing it is out of stock. Now I am thinking of what should I do. Apparently there is a better job offer and is indirectly linked to my study field but I had already promised this job. Dilemma! >_<

Sometimes I wonder if everything in this world has its own calculation. When I say to myself "Yeah everything has its own way to calculate", I was proved wrong. Because I can never calculate how you think, or what you think about me. I know that there might be alot more guys would do the same thing I did for you but I just hope that you can be sincere to me since I had been doing the same thing. Just hope that one day you would look for me and say "Look, I know you're nice and all but we're not going to work out." If you tell me that at least I know to stop. But now you are making me hanging in the middle of nowhere and it is starting to cause misery in me. I am no Saint nor robot. I have my own feelings and I do need someone to pamper me too.

Last but not least, I'd like to share this song to everyone who came across this blog.

You made me wonder.

Sometimes I wonder who am I to you. I just don't get it. I have been doing things all these while and trying show you that I am there for you but you just does not seem to notice that. That really made me heart break if you ever wonder. I am really wondering if there is any guy who willing to sacrifice as I do to you. You just made me wonder should I continue my plans or back off.

I love this picture alot because I took it when I was with you. But I guess you will never know about this too.



A little hint please? :/

Work!

I have decided to work since I only have three days class. Try to support myself since I am old enough. Classes are being like a bitch. And I've been busy all these few days because classes are like.. hectic.

Today get to meet my friends while I am on my way to One Utama to get a part time job. HEHE!



Recently registered as a candidate to vote for one of the political party. Never thought of that I would register that also. LOL!

Results are out!

Lucky enough, I got Bs for my Photography and a very unexpected subject; Intercultural Communication. I thought I'm going to get C or fail the subject but surprisingly I got a B! As for Cs are my college algebra, moral and introduction to news reporting. Phew! Luckily no fails or else I am going to kill myself. All results are fit well into my expected results but I really didn't expect to get a B for my intercultural class. Shoooo happy! :D :D

Happy new year! 2011

Happy new years guys! Hopefully I'll get a better year in 2011. Not to say 2010 isn't good enough, but I think 2011 it's going to be a blast! :)